The Big Leap
Photographer: Blair Darrell/ Location: East River State Park
Last year I spent four months in New York City completing an internship with a women's media publication. That short period of time living in NOLITA (don't ask how I managed that) confirmed something I think my heart already knew: I belonged in New York City. While I had fallen in love with the idea as a teenager visiting universities along the east coast, the dream fell to the wayside as I moved to Evanston, IL to pursue a journalism degree at Northwestern.
Attending Northwestern was definitely the right choice for me– I developed a voice within my writing, discovered an interest in various forms and focuses of media, and ultimately gained the foundation I needed to follow my journalistic dreams. Even though moving to Evanston delayed my plans to live in the big city, it also shaped the pathway to actualize the crazy dreams of an 18-year-old. I met friends who could support my dream to move someplace else and friends who would take the journey alongside me.
At first I was hesitant to declare my intentions. I didn't know if I would have a job (plot twist: I still don't). I didn't know if my friends would secretly think I was crazy (thank you for not ever telling me I was even if you thought it). I didn't know what my parents would think (thank you for always supporting me). But I knew that it was the next step I needed to take. Everything was so clear to me. I had to take a leap of faith and believe that my soul knew best. I knew my intuition was correct– I belonged in New York City.
And two weeks ago, I finally went for it. I packed my belongings into six suitcases and took a one-way flight to LaGuardia. I took the big leap.
And the reality behind this crazy stunt? Guys, I was so scared. Even if you know something is right in your heart, it doesn't stop you from imagining all of the horrible what-ifs. As human beings, our cognitive ability of deliberate, conscious thought insures there is a gap between our initial impulse and the actual act (thanks Vincent Deary). This gap is what makes us human and ultimately led to a competition of the best case vs. worst-case scenario in my head.
Truthfully, the move was a roller coaster of emotions. Prior to the move, I broke down into tears talking to my mom at least once wanting to know if I was making the right choice. The first night in my new apartment in Bushwick I couldn't fall asleep. I just stared at the ceiling, sweating on my makeshift bed of couch cushions feeling so unfamiliar with my surroundings. My first week in Brooklyn I barely had an appetite because I was so stressed out by the move and trying to figure out how to budget furniture, food and necessities in an incredibly expensive city.
But here we stand two weeks later and it's crazy how different it all feels. I'm already feeling comfortable and self-assured in my decision. I spend countless hours researching places in Brooklyn while simultaneously perusing job postings in hopes of finding something I'm qualified to do (if you know of anything, seriously hit me up). I hop on-and-off subways like a pro, venturing between Brooklyn and Manhattan. I regularly visit the Williamsburg Starbucks where I sit for hours taking advantage of the free AC and WiFi (Side Note: All of the employees wear hats here and after reading the Starbucks employee posting about the new hat request it's kind of hilarious. But it's also the hippest Starbucks I've even been to because #Williamsburg). I venture between small markets in search of the best deals on produce in my neighborhood. I continue to develop recipes in my oddly spacious kitchen (I can now make a bomb salsa despite the disparaging lack of counter space). This is just the long way of saying that I'm starting to feel settled. I'm developing my own routine. Life is continuing.
And with that comes a sense of assurance. There is still so much I need to figure out and do, but I'm actually getting there.
All of that established, now comes the real reason why I'm bearing my soul to you. To be honest, I've always wanted to have a blog. It's the ideal place to continue to write and to practice photography. After taking a big leap of faith with the move to NYC, I couldn't help but realize it was time to take a few other jumps in my life. So here comes the second big jump: launching my own blog.
My first week in Brooklyn I began to develop plans for this blog. I set up a new email address, purchased the domain, and of course locked down the Instagram handle. I started to put my time and effort behind a dream I had discussed with my friends over and over again. Today, I finally felt confident enough to launch the website and introduce this little idea to the world.
That being said, I hope that this blog can be a reflection of my life and learning in not only Brooklyn, but hopefully life beyond. They say your twenties are the best time of your life and not to let them slip by too quickly. While I don't really know what's ahead, I do know that having this blog is the ultimate way to document it. I just know that one day, when everything has changed, I'll be able to reminisce on it all.
Ultimately, I hope to cover a little bit of everything with this blog. The mash-up will likely include food and various adventures. Maybe I'll give insight on the current books I'm reading or even share a recipe. And of course there will be random musings. I guess we'll just have to see.
So, I'll leave you with this final quote and knowledge that there's more to come. After all, this was just the second big jump.